Blog
The not knowing

The not knowing

We are in uncertain times, and what we can learn from these times is how to be with not-knowing. When our usual routine gets interrupted, we realize that we cannot take anything for granted. Our lives can change completely in an instance and our illusion of safety...

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What we are is peace

What we are is peace

My teacher told me the story of the monks who were happily meditating when a bunch of savage looking guys with big curved swords ran inside screaming. The monks didn’t move a muscle and the biggest meanest guy stood right in front of one of the monks, held up his...

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Being Held by Sacredness

Being Held by Sacredness

    Spirituality is an experience and each of us has our own relationship with it. We can read one hundred books but if we just read it with our minds, and it is not an actual experience, then it is simply a way for the ego to grab onto thinking it knows...

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About fear

About fear

As long as I can remember I have had panic attacks in the night about not being able to breath. Here I am again, waking up suddenly in a total panic and I jump out of bed and try to calm myself. I walk around a bit, shake my arms and legs and feel the sensation in my...

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Humbling

Humbling

As a Dutch person I am prone to arrogance. I am not sure why it is that we Dutch are seemingly more arrogant then a lot of other cultures (maybe except the French 😊) but I know it doesn’t say anything about our underlying self acceptance, because arrogance is just the...

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Hearts (poetry)

Hearts (poetry)

My friend and me when we are together we cry a lot every other sentence one of us chokes up tears falling in our food We are easily touched by the state of the world or our connection to a tree or by the beauty in the hearts of the people we know since we can see...

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Faith

Faith

My father is fervently anti-religion. This is the result of him growing up in a very strict and sober religious household. He loves to discuss religion with other people and his favorite subjects are about belief and faith. He always said that, according to the bible,...

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Faith (poetry)

Faith (poetry)

When I was younger I tried to control all situations I had an agenda for everything but lately I am wandering aimlessly and without knowing curious what is to come my heart light as a feather   Because I realized in hindsight that life was never not by my side that...

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The love that we are

The love that we are

I remember when my daughter was little and I was overwhelmed and distracted she used to grab my head in her little hands and say Look at me mama, look at me looking straight into my eyes until I became present again.   I feel the beloved is calling us like that...

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Reality

Reality

We spend most of our time with our attention away from actual reality. This means that we are spending a lot of our time in illusion. This is so, because the only reality that is alive, is the experience of the actual moment, the now. This experience is always very...

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my world is my mirror
it shows me perfectly
that what is not resting yet
that what still feels separate
from the love that I am