My father is fervently anti-religion. This is the result of him growing up in a very strict and sober religious household. He loves to discuss religion with other people and his favorite subjects are about belief and faith. He always said that, according to the bible, believing means knowing something for sure that you can’t know. My father thinks that is the biggest nonsense ever and that having faith is simply pretty stupid.
It is interesting cause somehow my life is all about faith. Something about his religious upbringing or my ancestry has always touched me. And although I don’t believe in a punishing God but more in Love itself, I realized not so long ago that I am what my family approvingly would have called pious. I only live for this energy of Love. The world has no meaning for me without this connection I feel to that energy that contains everything. I am basically a nun!
So I believe that in the end it all comes down to faith. Do we believe we are supported? Do we believe that everything that happens is perfectly designed to help us get to know ourselves deeper? Do we trust that the world has our back, or that it is out to get us if we don’t behave well?
Can we feel total heartbreak and know at the same time it is perfect? Can we feel grateful while crying our eyes out?
The more we trust life, the more we can let go of control and let life flow through us. Trusting life means saying yes to whatever comes up in us. It feels so good to me to say yes. Even in deep physical pain saying yes feels like the ultimate surrender to Love. And I realized that when I feel resistance or blame, it usually means there is some heartbreak to feel.
Accept just for this moment that the current devastating situation in the world, where still so many people and even kids get hurt, is nobody’s fault. Everybody did the best they could with what they believed was true. Then notice that, when there is nobody to blame, all we can do is let our heart break..
And when we let our heart break and feel the depth of pain that is in our world, we can act from a genuine feeling of love, instead of simply trying to get away from pain.
When we trust life it is easier to accept what happens in our life. And without fighting wat is, or trying to fix something, we can be in the here and now with our attention.
In a deeper way, trusting life comes down to trusting our selves, since everything is a projection, everything is a mirror of our inner state.
Do we support ourselves or blame ourselves? Are we trying to change ourselves, get better, heal, improve? Or do we know deeply how perfect we are, including our hopeless humanness?
We really are already perfect. We are already only love. We are preciously human and have done the best we could with what we believed was true and with the traumas we carry.
When we know this, we can relax and be free to be who we are. Accepting we definitely will make mistakes -since after all we are human. But also knowing that, when we say sorry genuinely, we get even closer to others, so how can we lose?
We don’t need to hide any parts of ourselves, how silly they may be, and we can be open about our flaws. Somebody might say something about us in a tone full of blame, like “You are so sensitive!!!” -or whatever other word we can think of. And we can relax, look at it and say “Yes, you are right, I am a bit sensitive about this.” or, if that is not true, we can simply say “no, I don’t think I am.” When we accept ourselves there is no need to defend or pretend, because we love ourselves exactly how we are.
And then we realize, that when we relax and trust, say yes to ourselves, and let life flow through us, we can’t help but be grateful. Even if what comes through in that moment is grief or heartbreak.
We are and have always been one with life, and those moments when we realize this and simply feel our aliveness, we are home.